Dumped Blown Off and Shit Upon

It has happened to everyone. All of a sudden your phone calls aren't returned, plans are cancelled at the last minute. You are blown off. Dumped. Usually a dumping is followed by lots of tears and a few long talks with your best girlfriend who tells you he wasn't good enough for you anyway and does her best to make you laugh.

What happens when it is your best girlfriend is the one doing the dumping? Thats right. My best friend has been in the process of dumping me for quite some time. She will hang out with anyone and everyone but me. Even people who steal from her. Everytime I call it goes to voicemail. She hardly ever returns my calls and when she does she unexpectedly has to go or her cell phone stops working. hmmmm.

I am pissed and lonely and I feel so stupid. Its really not that different at all from being dumped by a man. The main difference is I don't have anyone to commiserate with about it. I mean who exactly do you call to cry about your best friend dumping you to??

I have a sack full of stuff I have been going to give her for months but she never comes over. The last time I went over there she ran outside and acted like a kid whose parents showed up unexpectedly in the midst of her party.

I was a really good friend. I was thoughtful and funny and dependable and I shared beauty products. I tried not to judge and tried to be supportive even when her choices were so blatantly wrong they scared me to death. I kept secrets and provided alibis. I thought I did everything right and still here I am dumped.

So I am a mopey, dumpee who doesn't know what to do with myself. To compound the problem I have been reading one of those sappy women's friendship books all day. The Ya Ya Travelhood of the Divine Sister Pants. You know the type. ...The actual title is the Fabulous Traveling Funeral of Annie Freeman. The basic premise is this group of women go around the country scattering the ashes of their best friend according to her last wishes.

Blah

I am sisterless and friendless. I will NOT call her again under any circumstances. What I need is a good long talk with my best boyfriend to tell me she was never good enough for me anyway.....and to make me laugh.